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Elle posted a symbolic gesture
Sunday, June 4, 2023
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Not forgotten - thinking of you on this 5th anniversary, Momma. Love you always. Miss you. E.
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Elizabeth posted a symbolic gesture
Friday, June 18, 2021
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Thought of you on the 4th, as always. Miss you still, Mom.
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elle posted a symbolic gesture
Saturday, January 2, 2021
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Thinking of you on your 89th, Mom. Love you and miss your humour. :)
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elle posted a symbolic gesture
Monday, October 26, 2020
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hi mom
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Marianne lit a candle
Friday, June 5, 2020
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Elle posted a symbolic gesture
Friday, June 5, 2020
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Two years yesterday (but today, as I'm still up!) - two years too long. Remembering you and Dad.
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Friday, February 28, 2020
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Friday, February 28, 2020
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Friday, February 28, 2020
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Friday, February 28, 2020
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Friday, February 28, 2020
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Friday, February 28, 2020
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The family of Mary Therese Neill uploaded a photo
Thursday, February 20, 2020
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elle posted a symbolic gesture
Tuesday, January 7, 2020
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Christmas and your birthday have both passed without you here - yet you were everywhere.
Love always,
Elle
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Marianne lit a candle
Friday, January 3, 2020
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Your birthday yesterday
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Marianne lit a candle
Sunday, December 1, 2019
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Miss you every day
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Elle Neill posted a condolence
Sunday, September 1, 2019
Things My Mother Left Behind (In Memory of my Mom: written November 2018.)
I've always loved balloons – the little spit-filled ones and the ones of vast adventures – all carriers of dream cargo, great and small, each defiant of impossibilities. I've loved them even though they never last. I still feel the sudden belly ache of accidentally letting go, the desperate stretch and empty grasp, the dashing to retrieve the ones that lift away. And I lament the ones protected in the house, for days buoyant at the ceiling until they dipped and hovered magically above the floor, only to shrivel and fall. My heart still stops for the suddenly, alarmingly popped and broken ones. Susceptible to fire, earth, and rain, balloons rise on air.
For five months, now, like house balloons, a little beaded necklace and a bag of chia seeds impossibly have hovered above the shelf in the next bedroom. For five months, impossibly, she has only just put them down, just now forgotten them, and will so soon be back to retrieve them that the shelf cannot quite ground them. They are buoyant with the imminence of her grasp, balloon-like in the brief touchdown and impossible lift as I glance in. I have protected them.
In a glance, they are in her hands again – retrieved and rising on the breeze of her return, light, and lifted, if monumentally fragile.
Not today. Today I look closer and they sit heavy, unclaimed, grounded, abandoned. Every day for five months radiant, ephemeral presences touched by her only moments ago, but today they hover low, deflated, no promise of lift on a sudden gust - about to land for good. Five months past.
I step in. This room is where she slept the night of our last slumber party. That next morning she left behind the small, beaded necklace with the bag of chia seeds. I must remember to bring them to her tomorrow, I told myself daily, for a week. Week's end caught her at emergency, never again to slumber here. She floated nineteen days - tossed by changing winds and chance - between earth and infinity.
Utterly immovable, these items now remain among the things she left behind.
My mother caught a light, June breeze; lifted up and up, away from the shelf of earth that housed and grounded her, from the oxygen tubes that primed her rise, from the torrents of our tears that would rain her back to us, if torrents of tears were such. With nowhere else to turn, or toss, she did not sink or break - she escaped above the burning ache of death. Suddenly, alarmingly, we could not catch her. Irretrievable, she rose on air to the oblivion beyond the clouds, to where the pull of earth, the push of water, the burn of fire are not.
She is now a dream I have – a fragile cargo, great and small, who defies in my sleep the impossibility of her own return.
Hovering, here, against the clawing pull, the drowning pressure, the breaking burn
I yet remain among the things
my mother left behind.
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Marianne Neill lit a candle
Tuesday, August 20, 2019
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Anniversary candle
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Marianne lit a candle
Tuesday, June 4, 2019
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Still beloved on this earth.
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Elle posted a symbolic gesture
Tuesday, June 4, 2019
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One year ago tonight, Mom, I couldn't believe I had to let you go - and yet time and again this year, you have caught me, and caught me - ever the net-beneath. I treasure you.
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Elle posted a symbolic gesture
Thursday, March 21, 2019
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Shannon's 35th just past on the first day of spring... wish you were here. :(
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Elle posted a symbolic gesture
Sunday, January 6, 2019
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Thinking of you this past week on your 87th - January 2, 2019. Got the Christmas decorations down at the cemetary today... back soon with love.
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Elle Neill uploaded photo(s)
Thursday, September 13, 2018
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Elle Neill uploaded photo(s)
Thursday, September 13, 2018
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Elle Neill uploaded photo(s)
Thursday, September 13, 2018
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Elle Neill uploaded photo(s)
Thursday, September 13, 2018
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Mary w Sandor Haas-Neill, 1993.
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Elle Neill uploaded photo(s)
Thursday, September 13, 2018
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Honeymoon, 1953.
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Marianne Neill uploaded photo(s)
Wednesday, September 12, 2018
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summer, 2017; AGO
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A Friend lit a candle
Monday, August 20, 2018
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Me again... posted a symbolic gesture
Saturday, August 11, 2018
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Mary Jane Handy-Zamudio posted a condolence
Wednesday, July 4, 2018
Where are the right words when we want them? Mary was Mary...a fiercely proud mother, a beloved and loving wife, a generous teacher, a loving sister, and someone without whom we would not have our first daughter, Greer. Mary and Sam's kindness in offering Frank and me a sanctuary as we struggled with a high-risk pregnancy, facing uncertainty about the outcome, while attempting to hide our overwhelming fear has never been forgotten, and never will.
Greer was born on August 16, although it would have been nice if she'd come a wee tad earlier so she could have arrived on Mary and Sam's wedding anniversary. Thanks to their steadfast beliefs and prayers, our family took its first steps toward real happiness.
Mary hired me to teach drama for the Saturday morning children's program, and through that, I met some amazing young people, some of whom have careers in the entertainment industry. That was because of Mary.
Here are some words that come to mind when I think of her - and when I think of her I always, always see her laughing in that slightly naughty way, because she's saying something that she knows she really shouldn't be saying, but loves the fun of it, bless her. Words: Nanaimo bars...dinner table discussions...the art collection mostly made up of the work of her extraordinarily talented children..."my feed-and-bath Shannon clothes"...Liz wanted something from Wendy's...Bob the butcher's wife's squares..."Oh, Saaaaaammm"...he promised me he'd never leave me...come and visit and stay for a whole weekend next time!...and so on and so on.
I will miss Mary for the rest of my days, and oh, how I wish I'd come for that weekend visit.
Love to Chris, Rob, Marianne, Sam, and Liz. You are the unique and beautiful people that you are because of your exceptional parents. So many of us envy you that. The pain and sadness you must be feeling are gifts. They are the feelings that come from having lost something very precious.
MJ
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Mary Jane Handy-Zamudio donated to ST JOSEPH'S HEALTH CARE FOUNDATION OF LONDON
Wednesday, July 4, 2018
In fondest memory and heart-overflowing-thanks for Mary T. Neill.
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Me posted a symbolic gesture
Thursday, June 21, 2018
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Elle lit a candle
Thursday, June 21, 2018
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Brian Harris donated to ST JOSEPH'S HEALTH CARE FOUNDATION OF LONDON
Wednesday, June 13, 2018
Sent with love and remembrance.
Love,
Brian, Liz, Lauren, Lee Ann, Dan & Reese
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Marianne Neill posted a condolence
Monday, June 11, 2018
I read this at my mother's service:
Not three weeks ago, my mother took what I had thought to be an unnecessary precaution, and told us what she wished for her funeral service, just in case something went wrong in hospital. We have managed to satisfy almost all her requests. One was that I write something and read it, as I had at my father’s funeral 26 years ago, so I will do my best. It’s called
My Mother’s Hands
Directing the scene
Dialing Elizabeth
Doing the crossword in the Saturday light
Setting up tea
Writing reports
Liking all our posts
Blowing a kiss
Purchasing gluten free vegetarian fast food in the park
Waving from security
Dialing Robert
Donning a costume
Strapping in for the ride
Clicking the mouse
Performing acts of kindness
Popping a cork
Writing plays
Wrapping gifts
Carrying dinner to a friend
Dialing Sam
Taking care of Bentley
Sorting out the photos
Showing me the papers
Giving things away
Conducting Ego Sum Pauper
Folding Shannon’s tooth fairy tooth into an envelope and keeping it until now
Gesturing Heil ppllt
Watering the plants
Dialing Chris
Signaling a clue
Flagging a cab on Fifth
Mailing the Christmas box, the birthday cards, the stuff I forgot to pack
Applauding love
Texting grandchildren
Tucking in the dream
Bearing the load
Bouncing back
Lifting the light
Stirring the heart
Stroking the tears
Holding her own
Seizing courage
Me: I saw a balloon from the balcony this morning
Texting back from hospital: was your dad on the balloon?
Me: Must have been.
a touch less wordy than Dad’s list for you will read worlds between the lines, and
this list disrupting its own rules in honor of your playful, brilliant mind.
My dear, beloved mother waving good-bye.
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Brenda and Jamie cooper posted a condolence
Saturday, June 9, 2018
We send, from Cape Breton, our heartfelt condolences to all of Mary’s family and friends. As you gather together to celebrate and console the life and loss of your beloved mother and friend, we will be thinking of you here.
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Sandor Haas-Neill posted a condolence
Saturday, June 9, 2018
Interment Speech (Sandor)
Nana was the only grandparent of mine I ever knew. I recall enjoying afternoons at her old house on the weekend and at times after school and seeing her as the nucleus of family events where she was always very friendly and welcoming, even when she had a lot on her plate. It always felt exciting to go to her house – there were popsicles, and in the old days it was the dwelling of Shannon's nintendo 64. And, of course, Nana, who would entertain us by telling us stories, many which she made up on the spot. Some were funny, some depicted adventures, and some of my personal favourites were scary, which she would complement by pulling out her false teeth to look like fangs.
I have always had a fondness for stories, and once I was old enough to write my own, I returned the favour and shared them with Nana due to her thoughtful analysis and critique of them and because she loved to hear them. Two years ago, I was very fortunate to live with her for a year while doing my masters, and through that I came to know her a lot better. I will miss staying up late and chatting about life, poems, interesting and sometimes dark thoughts; her boasting about the absolute luxury of her fuzzy winter pajamas; reminding me, with a look of disgust, that it is well past time to wash my bedsheets; and having her help with presentations – I hope that I am diaphram breathing and projecting properly right now.
Today I wanted to share with you the only story I can remember her telling me from childhood. Since googling the plot, I have learned that it isn't fully original, but Nana's version of the story was unique as details she couldn't recall she made up. I can't remember all the details from Nana's version either! But please enjoy my version of Nana's version of “Onions and Garlic.”
Long ago, in a kingdom called Werwick - not unlike those one imagines as a child - two brothers served as chefs at the court of the king. The older brother was named Edward, and the younger was named Henry, and from a very young age they had been fiercely competitive. One day, the king approached the brothers with news that a neighboring kingdom, Stonecroft, had been discovered, and that as a gesture of friendship, he was sending envoys to share the culture of Werwick, including its signature dishes. Edward, believing himself to be above the task, rejected it, declaring that his place was beside the king as his personal chef. And so Henry was burdened with the task. The next day at dawn Henry set out to Stonecroft in a horse-drawn cart, carrying some of the finest ingredients Werwick had to offer. Five days passed, and Henry found himself before the high counsel of Stonecroft cooking a stir fry over a small, stone fireplace. First he sauteed onions, and the aroma that flooded the room drew gasps of delight from the lords and ladies. Once the meal was prepared and served, Henry was approached by an elder of the counsel who asked “What was that orb who’s flavours brought the dish to life?”
“Oh, the onions, you mean?” Henry replied, somewhat puzzled.
“Onions...” the elder pronounced tentatively. “We do not have these in Stonecroft... For these we will trade you our most prized possessions: 1000 gold slabs and 1000 jewels from our treasure vault.” Henry accepted the offer, parting with the rest of his bushel of onions, and returned to Werwick with treasure weighing heavily on his cart. He was greeted as a hero in the throne room, much to the envy of his older brother, Edward, who later begged the King's permission to serve as a second envoy to Stonecroft that he might introduce them to garlic and return with an even more gluttonous sample of wealth. The king agreed, a cart was prepared, and five days later Edward stood before the high counsel of Stonecroft. He bore an arrogant smirk on his face as he peeled the garlic, dropping generous, minced portions into the garlic potato stew he boiled. The lords and ladies of Stonecroft were aflutter with delight as they tasted Edward's creation, and an elder of the counsel approached him.
“My dear boy, this is simply the greatest thing we have ever tasted; what is the name of these bulbs you chopped so finely into our stew?”
“Garlic.” Edward said proudly.
“Garlic...” the elder enunciated. “We simply must trade you for these heavenly bulbs, as they cannot be found anywhere in our lands. For these we will trade you our most prized possessions!” the elder said excitedly. Stewards of the court entered the treasure room and emerged two minutes later to hand Edward a bushel of onions.
Before I conclude, I would like to briefly mention another thing that I feel this gathering should know about Nana that I learned in adulthood, which is that she was remarkably good at freestyle battle rapping – like, surprisingly seriously good – like, you probably don't even believe me, and if you do, you probably still aren't comprehending her skill. One night, when Liam was beatboxing in the living room, we asked her to diss him, which she did while keeping it rather politically correct. After learning that Liam “sucked” and “was stinky,” we asked if we could film her talent. But she said that that would make her feel self conscious. So, in the absence of a video, I felt it was important that I make her talent known by word of mouth.
That was all I wanted to share with you today. In conclusion, I just want to say: Goodbye Nana. I'm glad to have known you, to have had your love and support growing up, and to have lived with you for a year, as an adult.
I will miss you a lot.
And I will love you forever.
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Beverley Stirling posted a condolence
Saturday, June 9, 2018
It was a great pleasure to meet Mary as a participant in her SLR Improv group “Be A Player”. She was a gifted and inspiring teacher, meting out constructive critique with a mixture of humour, candor and forthrightness. She provided a wonderful learning experience. She will be greatly missed. Please accept my condolences for your loss.
Beverley Stirling
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Ian Underhill posted a condolence
Saturday, June 9, 2018
What a lovely lady and what a talented teacher. My sincerest condolences to the family, many of whom I have taught.
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Marianne lit a candle
Friday, June 8, 2018
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Patricia Patterson posted a condolence
Friday, June 8, 2018
Please accept my condolences on the loss of your mother. You will miss her dearly. I miss her and my connection was slight in comparison. Mary and I were acquainted through SLR. I can tell you she was one of the liveliest of the of the Lively Poet's Society members. She could always illuminate the discussion no matter what poetry was presented. I always looked forward to her choices and always learned something new. I smile as I remember how she put her foot down on discussion of the US president. She just wouldn't allow it! Mary had a wonderful sense of humor and was a proud and no-nonsense feminist. I remember her with admiration and also a little envy. She is the only woman I know who got a sonnet from her husband each year for her birthday. She spoke of him and her children with such affection and pride! I also wondered how she could keep up the pace of her busy life. She was a great woman.
Kind regards
Pat
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Sandy Conrad donated to ST JOSEPH'S HEALTH CARE FOUNDATION OF LONDON
Friday, June 8, 2018
She did so much for so many with an open heart and a smile.
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Sandy Conrad posted a condolence
Friday, June 8, 2018
I am so sorry that you have all lost your mom, your grandmother, your friend. She was so alive and gracious the last time I saw her, still generous, still warm. It does not seem possible that she is gone. She spoke with such pride of her family. Her heart was huge and I feel privileged to have known her.
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Michael Doyle posted a condolence
Friday, June 8, 2018
We send our condolences to Elizabeth and family.
Michael, Tyrone C., Tyrone F.
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Frank Handy posted a condolence
Friday, June 8, 2018
Hello everyone in the Neill family, and especially Liz and Shannon.
I heard this sad news and wanted to send my heartfelt condolences from here in Melbourne. I am sorry I will not be able to attend the funeral or pass on my condolences in person.
Mary was very important in my life, and then in our family's life. She was a generous and loving person, and with Sam built a generous and loving life and legacy.
Liz, you probably will remember more than would the rest of your family how Mary and your Dad sheltered Mary Jane and me when Greer was born, and the support and love she gave to us during that difficult time. She said to us that she was simply passing on kindnesses that she had received in a similar situation, but it was typical of her generosity that on hearing about the situation she suggested and insisted on putting me up in their house for several weeks while Mary Jane waited in the London hospital for Greer to be born (Mary also insisted on baking blueberry pies and pretending that it was just a coincidence that she did it while I was there!). Then after Greer's birth day operation for several weeks Mary and Sam put both Mary Jane and me up, until Greer was ready to leave hospital and we could return to Windsor. In appreciation we asked her to be Greer's godmother, and Greer has had a special memory and connection to her ever since. When we asked how we could possibly acknowledge her kindness and generosity, she said simply that when we had the chance we could pass on the generosity in another situation. So I felt fortunate to be able to return a small portion of that generosity when Mary was able to use my apartment in Toronto to be close to George during his final days.
Mary was a tremendous mentor and guide for me in many courses and plays, as she was for countless others during our university days. It was astounding to me how she and Sam could be constant and tireless hosts for an infinite number of theater related events, although Sam appearing in his robe and pajamas to do the dishes was a clear signal that he had less patience for people staying too long than Mary did! We stayed too long because Mary and Sam's home was such a warm and welcoming place to be.
Despite the immediate challenge of Mary's passing, your family's memories and experiences will always be much deeper and more warm than anyone else's, as you were the focus of her life, and these memories will not fade, nor cool. Love and condolences to all of you, and please remember in your memorial to her my thanks for the great good fortune my family and I had of knowing and experiencing Mary's love and generosity. Take care. Frank Handy
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Kirsten Ebsen posted a condolence
Friday, June 8, 2018
My thoughts are with you and your family in this time of grief. She was not only a gracious lady, but highly learned and made me feel very welcome in your home when I met her in London. A woman who left only kind deeds behind her. I know she was much loved by her students as I have met several here in Vancouver who remembered her from years ago and raved about her. Blessings to you all.
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Marylee Holmes posted a condolence
Friday, June 8, 2018
My deepest sympathies to the entire family. Sending much love and prayers. Greatest loss is that of loosing a Matriarch. May you find comfort in the stories & memories ❤️
Love Marylee
(Granddaughter of Frank Greive)
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Natalie Neill lit a candle
Friday, June 8, 2018
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Remembering my Aunt Mary with love.
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Stephanie Greive and Trevor Price posted a condolence
Thursday, June 7, 2018
To Marianne, Robert, Chris, Sam, Liz and all your families - sending our heartfelt condolences for the loss of your mom, grandmother to all your kids...
We will always remember Aunty Mary for her dynamic approach to everything she engaged in, for the love she had for her family, the pride she expressed in all of her children and grandchildren.
We do know how much she will be missed.
May you have lots of opportunities to share and cherish your fondest memories of her, with each other and your kids - and may these memories bring some solace, laughter, and joy during the journey through grief and profound loss.
Moms actually do live forever.
Love
Stephanie and Trevor
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Connie Harris donated to ST JOSEPH'S HEALTH CARE FOUNDATION OF LONDON
Thursday, June 7, 2018
Mary will be greatly missed by her older sister, Connie.
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Janelle Mellamphy posted a condolence
Thursday, June 7, 2018
My sincere condolences to Mary's entire family. She was an amazing person, a powerhouse and true inspiration, and the impact she had on so very many children through Western's Saturday Morning Drama lessons -- to name but one of her many endeavours -- well, it's just immeasurable. She will be fondly remembered by so very many people who were lucky enough to be influenced by her passion and talents.
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Tanya lit a candle
Thursday, June 7, 2018
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Debra Cooper posted a condolence
Thursday, June 7, 2018
Dearest Rob and Jewels.
My deepest sympathies to you and your family on the loss of your mother. She looked to be an amazing woman and there’s nothing worst than the loss of a mother.
She will be greatly missed. May she Rest In Peace.
Debra and Mark
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patsy morgan posted a condolence
Thursday, June 7, 2018
I was truly saddened to learn of Mary's passing. She was a valued member of the Brickenden Theatre Awards for many years. Most recently as a member of our Original Script Panel. In my brief time as Chair of the Brickenden Board of Trustees, I had the opportunity to get to know Mary, and I am so grateful for our chats, emails and all of the wisdom and advice she gave me.
My deepest condolences to all of Mary's family and friends.
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Janet Parker posted a condolence
Thursday, June 7, 2018
In deep sympathy with all the family.
Mary was the essence of kindness
and vitality. With fond memories,
Janet Parker
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Maria Vander Hoek lit a candle
Wednesday, June 6, 2018
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Elle uploaded photo(s)
Wednesday, June 6, 2018
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Sweet dreams, my sweet mother.
Photo by: Sam D. Neill 1953.
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